State of Confusion?

I've totally no FUCKING idea what I want in life. Do I want to work in sales? Or some office job? Or sucking dicks in a dark alley behind Bukit Bintang for dirty cash?

Sales IS interesting, without a doubt. Charged with constant motivation from my managers (They sure know how to motivate the fuck out of their employees using sales talk), I'm beginning to have doubts -_- Maybe I'm doing so bad cause I didn't put enough effort in this job? Wouldn't it be the same if I carry this same attitude anywhere I go? Maybe I'm destined to suck dicks for a living? Isn't it indisputable that every kind of job has its own hardships?

.... Wait, what's that flying in the sky? Is it a plane? Is it Superman? OH GOD NO IT'S MR. HEY's FUCKING EGO!!!

FUCK MY "SUPPLIER" It's not the company that's bad (well, maybe something's wrong with their processes and policies), it's the supplier. We're the middlemen after all and I fully accept the fact that maybe I'm just not cut out for the company.

Gah, fuck that shit. Let me just share about my experience with a customer today.

I was at an appointment with a potential client and the director of the company (assumption) runs a recruitment agency. Of course, it was the perfect chance for me to ask about the rigorous hiring process Philip Morris and how much longer I have to wait for them to hire the BEST FUCKING MARKETING guy in the world (I actually mean my own perfect world where I'm the creator and destroyer, alpha and omega).

Sadly, he knows nothing about PMI's hiring process but instead, he introduced me to a company that's currently looking for a Marketing graduate to be trained right now aaaaaaand asked for my resume. Surely, it came as a shock cause who the fuck would expect this shit to happen during an appointment? Checked the company's profile a little while ago it "looks" impressive, no doubt. Sure is an interesting way to secure a potential interview, eh?

Rest assured, my dear manager, cause I did go through the whole presentation, quotation, objection handling before moving on to my personal ventures.

Oh yeah, this is the third time someone offered me during my three months stint over here.

I have this habit of lying to myself and telling myself I'm fucking awesome.