Impossible Is Nothing

Below is a conversation between two mature, grown up gentlemen. This brief discussion took place in a very high classed restaurant on top of some tall building in a certain city. But may God damn these two souls to hell, for their intentions were not pure. Sin consumed their bare heart and soul, leaving nothing left for the pure to grab hold of. Let’s not waste time, and let me unravel the conversation concerning .. “The Ultimate Argument of the Possible.”

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A: Hmm, do you believe in time travel like in the movie, Back to The Future? *takes a sip off the glass of wine*

B: Not really, it is a highly improbable feat to achieve. Ah, let me rephrase. It is definitely impossible for our small brains to accomplish time travel. Take your time to prepare your rebuttal, friend.

A: Time? I need not time to counter your argument. Have you ever seen shit eating porn? The 2 Girls 1 Cup shit? Yeah, the one when you grabbed your dick getting ready to jack off but got freaked out when you saw them licking shit? AND YOU TELL ME TIME TRAVELLING IS IMPOSSIBLE? ALL THIS BULLSHIT WHEN YOU’VE SEEN SHIT EATING PORN? THERE IS NOTHING, NOTHING OUT THERE IN THIS WORLD THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE WHEN YOU’VE SEEN SHIT EATING PORN! *jumps off the building to his death*

B: *grabbing the chairs with his sweaty palms* May Satan spare his soul, at least don’t torture him by making him watch shit eating porn for eternity….
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Although the above conversation is purely fictional and fully takes place in my imagination, I would like to make a clever guess that approximately 1/3 of the porn surfing community have never lived a normal life after watching shit eating porn. Either they committed suicide, or they failed committing suicide and end up in the hospital. What I’d like to convey through this post is that I think nothing is impossible in this world except eternity.. or time.

Let’s talk about the possible first. Can you imagine human eating something out from the asshole? When we were young we were told to not eat shit, or even step on shit. But these brave souls proved us wrong. Shit is edible, shit eating is their profession. I take their work as an insult personally, it’s like all my beliefs are trampled on mercilessly, they’ve thrown their food(shit) all over my belief that shit eating is impossible. Dayum! Now I can’t ask people to eat shit anymore, who knows they secretly love eating shit! (Sam I’m looking at you)

That day I stumbled upon a disgusting blog talking about BDSM and bestiality. What ran through my mind was, “Nah this is impossible, no sane human being would do this kind of shit.” But analytically, I rested on my white plastic mamak chair and thought to myself, “But then again, this shit doesn’t even come close to shit eating porn!” Carefully, I closed the browser, hoping never to encounter such insidious crime against humanity ever again…

On the other hand,

Eternity, in my opinion, is the ONLY thing that is impossible. Not that I’m complaining that I haven’t enough time to fuck chicks and whatnot. Hell, I’m kinda scared of eternity. Imagine what the fuck you’re going to do if you’re gonna live for eternity. Watch tv all day? Think of shit to blog about all day? What if you got cancer at the age of 30 and you have to live through it until a cure is found? Now that shit is fucking boring, and painful too.

Moral of the story, next time when you think something is improbable. Think shit eating porn. It will open a whole new world for you. Just like when Aladin thought it’s impossible to fly on a flying velvet carpet with Jasmine.